Give yourself permission to feel any combination of ways, even if they are contradictory. We're complicated beings and often have mixed and multiple feelings. We crave things we know are bad for us. We declare an opinion and then change our minds. Life is not black & white and can be chaotic & illogical. Experiment with letting the "shoulds" go and allow yourself to be and feel anything. Note: This does not give you permission to behave in any way - this is an exercise in acceptance of your feelings.
EXAMPLES:
"You can feel angry and you can forgive. And you don't have to forgive."
"You can want to be with him and not want to be with him."
"You can feel confident except when you don't."
"You can be open to therapy and be skeptical about it."
"You can know what you want and have no clue what you want."
"You don't have to agree with everything you say."
Permission #1: TO
You can ...
It's okay ...
You're okay if ...
Permission #2: NOT TO HAVE TO
You don't have to ...
It's ok if you don't ...
You're ok if you don't ...
Permission #3: INCLUDING OPPOSITES
You can and not ...
You can some of the time ...
It doesn't have to make logical sense ...
Permission #4: EXCEPTIONS
That's the way it is, except when it's not ...
You can swing between this and that ...
From Bill O'Hanlon, Inclusion Therapy